My mysterious feisty guest blogger is back again! This time she’s talking about her boobs…
1. They get in the way.
I’m not kidding here, they get in the way of everything. Even on the beach I have to dig a hole for them so I can comfortably lay on my front.
2. Everyone loves boobs.
I bet a few of you here are wondering why that’s a bad thing?! Let me break it down for you: bras make big boobs look amazing. I’m not denying that at all. But the minute you want me to free the bad boys…shit no! Unless you got some antigravity switch they gon’ be saggy as hell!
3. +cup bras are hella expensive.
Unless you buy your +cup bra in a highstreet shop (they break quite soon) your going to be spending £28+ on your over the shoulder boulder holders. God punished me enough by giving me these large breasts so please take mercy on me and lower the price. I only own four bras and collectively they’re worth over £100!
4. Small boobed girls’ jealousy.
“Wow are those fake?” “Your so lucky to have big boobs” “Can I touch them?” “God look at that sl*t with her boobs out” “You should show off your best assets more often”
How about no? You can’t win ever! Like ever. People always have their own opinion on my boobs. But I don’t care…they’re my boobs!
5. Getting clothes that fit.
Sometimes I have to choose between a waist and modesty. If I choose waist the top is usually a bit tight on my boobs. I looked down once at work and saw my boobs were out thanks to a rogue button…I don’t even know how long they were out for!! If I choose boobs, (unless it’s tight) it tends to hang off of them like a tent and I instantly gain a dress size.
6. Sports bras.
They are a necessary addition to everyday life if you have breasts. Some basic life activities can be heavily impaired by not wearing a sports bra. Such as:
1) running for anything (bus,train,taxi)
3) wildly dancing in the club I don’t want to walk around with permanent black eyes.
So I strap these bad boys down in a Wanderbra sports bra called “The Shock Absorber”
I don’t mean to be gross…but it gets lost in there. I have taken my bra off at night to shower after being at the cinema and like four popcorn kernels came out. I couldn’t even feel they were in there!! Gross gross gross.
*last but not least* 8. Sweaty Under Boob Alert (SUBA)
Now all sizes breasts can and do get SUBA. But usually after exercise or a really hot day. Those of us with large boobs? A daily occurance. I mean daily. I can literally be sat in bed and my boobs will have sweat between them. Don’t even get me started on after the gym. Or the smell…
Until next time…
Do you think she’s right? Is she missing anything? Let us know below!