This is the first guest post of many from a feisty friend of mine, and I promise you she will change your life. Listen up!
Hello boys and girls,
Today I aim to change your life. I got similar advice a few years ago and it certainly changed mine.
THE ORGASM. More importantly the partner-partner orgasm. Just because of the nature of where this story stemmed from I’m preaching to the sisters who never get their ‘O-time” but I recognise this happens in any relationship not just the heterosexual ones (feminist agenda *check*).
Why on earth is it that we don’t get to orgasm every time we engage in a sexual activity? More importantly…why do we let our partners orgasm and not us?
You need to learn the following phrase… “NO! DON’T STOP!” Shout it, scream it, whisper it in a sexy tone -WHATEVER- just don’t let them get away with it. Unfortunately not everyone can orgasm from a bit of “p-in-v” so don’t be afraid to get it first. Go and win that race!! The early bird gets the worm ladies. In the past I have outright said there is no intercourse until I have orgasmed. They’ve got to learn some time!
NEW CLUB RULES; if you want to play then you need to follow the rules. Don’t be afraid to say “don’t stop”. If your other half is going down on you don’t let him stop until you’ve orgasmed. Push their head back down, hell push it further when their down ‘there’ but for heavens sake don’t let them stop until you’ve screamed their name in every single language you know.
So you’re horny as hell and you wanna get to the sex as quick as possible. I get it…we’ve all been there. Don’t be afraid to use your hands!! There are plenty of positions (and I’m adventurous) where you can use your hands to add to the fun. Sometimes I make my chosen partner in crime use their hands to compliment the penetration whilst I’m playing with my nipples like they’re tweedle dum and dee! Tell them how you want it! Hell, act like your bloody Siri navigating someone to the nearest Ann Summers. “Up, down, faster and slower” are things I very commonly say whilst in bed…and I rarely walk away feeling let down. I’m not talking sub/dom kinda shit (though that can be a little sexy) but tell them how you want it and how you want it now.
A) You’re getting what you want. #winning
B) The other person will find turning you on sexy. #doublewinning
C) Yay orgasms! Think of it as education. Know that you are teaching this person how to deliver in the bedroom and know that all those future orgasms are really screams of appreciation to the legacy you have created. (too far?)
D) This is probably THE most important rule to my playing club. KNOW WHAT YOU LIKE!!!! I used to find masturbating a very difficult subject and now I love it and wouldn’t be without It. How the hell is someone else supposed to make you orgasm if you don’t even know how to do it for yourself. Get down there, fiddle around and find out how you like it. Don’t be discouraged if it takes ages, just stick with it! You can try toys, porn, lube or loads of different things. Just do it!! There’s no better way to love yourself than to give yourself a glorious orgasm.
I hope this gives you a little confidence in the bedroom. Life without great sex isn’t a life if you ask me. But then again I am kind of obsessed.
So stop your partner…go and find that O and never let go again.